Maybe you have figured it out by now if you’ve been following my blog. If you’re new here, or if you just haven’t come to this conclusion on your own, let me be the first to tell you – I am a total badass. Like a Chuck Norris super badass.
The only difference between me and Chuck Norris in that clip is that I run in the rain, and Chuck Norris fights bears with his bare hands.
If you happened to be driving in Athens between the hours of 3:30 and just after 5 pm on Sunday, you might have seen something that looked a lot like a drowned rat wearing a bright orange safety vest running the same half-mile stretch of road over and over and over again. You might have thought that you should pull over and offer some help to the poor disoriented rat. But then maybe you got a glimpse of the crazed look in that drowned rat’s eyes and you thought better of it. Good call. That was no rat, my friend. That was me. The Chuck Norris badass.
How did I make the brilliant decision to go running in a monsoon? Well, you see, in a moment of pure genius yesterday, I decided I would put off my long run until later in the afternoon. I would spend most of the morning doing things around the house, where it was warm and dry. Then, I would run. I decided to do that without checking the weather forecast or consulting any weather experts. I concluded, based on zero data, that perhaps the light rain I was seeing in the morning would end and then I would run in the afternoon when everything was nice and dry.
Well, guess what?
So, because I’m
crazy a total badass, I ran 9 miles in the pouring rain. I was tired and gross and soaked to the core. My shoes were making a really disgusting sloshing sound. My hair had a life of its own and began spontaneously wrapping itself into matted dreadlocks. About 7 miles in, I saw this old man running with a plastic bag on his head. I was so thrilled to see someone else out there too that I (perhaps a little too aggressively) gave him a giant smile and thrust a thumbs up at him as we passed each other. Plastic Bag Man looked a little startled, like he thought I was coming at him instead of jogging past him, but he returned my thumbs up and we continued on our merry way. Go us.
To be honest, it wasn’t really all that bad. I definitely thought about quitting more times than I could count. I started reasoning with myself that it would still be pretty badass if I quit after 5 miles or even 7 miles in the frickin’ rain. Honestly though, that’s not all that different from normal for me. I’m always reasoning with myself about how much further I really need to run or if I can just quit and turn back immediately.
Afterwards I celebrated by taking a long bath and drinking some wine and trying not to move too much. It was epic.
Perhaps after reading this post, you’re now thinking about running in a monsoon of your own someday. You could check out these tips on running in the rain from About.com. Or you could read my modified version here.
How should I prepare to run in a monsoon?
1. Put on your normal running clothes plus a hat with a brim.
Caveat: if your normal running clothes include adorable highlighter yellow running shoes, swap those out for the less adorable back up running shoes. You can thank me later.
2. Prepare yourself to get completely wet. Don’t delude yourself into believing that any portion of you will be dry after this process. Put your phone in a zip-loc bag or don’t bring it at all.
3. Go outside. Curse. Go back inside
4. Put on your fluorescent orange micro-fleece vest. This way cars can see you. Despite my tip in #2 you may be temporarily deluded that this will keep you dry. It will not.
5. Just go. Tell the voice in your head to shut the hell up and just go.